True Story Tuesday!

It’s been relatively quiet…errr…translation: I haven’t done anything stupid enough to mention. So I thought I would share my incredible Sunday with everyone!

Chandler was saved several years ago, but he was never baptized. We wanted to leave it up to him to decide and not influence his decision in any way. I may meddle in everything else, but this is not an area I want to inappropriately pressure my children.

So several weeks ago, Chandler and I watched a Nicholas Cage movie (of all things) that brought about a discussion on Heaven and salvation, etc. It was one of those comfortable conversations that I felt able to ask him why he’d never wanted to be baptized.

He was scared.

Awwww…then I felt bad. LOL He said he didn’t know what to do or where to go to do it and he was scared of looking dumb. My poor baby…..

So I walked him through what he would do first (go down front), then the day he was baptized, he would bring a change of clothes, a comb for his hair, and his Dad would go up with him to the room leading to the Baptismal. (It’s called a baptismal right?) Gordon would be with him and he would tell us everything we needed to know.

So Sunday morning, my youngest son was baptized! Yes, I was just a little proud….

Before they went down, Gordon prayed over him. Yes, I may have welled up pretty bad over this one. I love my Pastor!

Gordon knew how nervous Chandler was, so he stayed with him and guided him through it all. It was the sweetest thing!

I’m really trying to pay attention and catch everything, and then I noticed Mike on the opposite side of me….all teary eyed…..OMGosh, yes, at that point I cried.

At this point, Gordon was talking about Chandler. He had taken Chandler along with him during our “fishing” trip to the mall to share our faith with people and Chandler is just one of those young people that isn’t afraid to do it! He doesn’t mind handing out tracts at all! And because of this boldness, Chandler won the prize for the first person to hand out all of his tracts: the NEW David Crowder CD and let me just say……ummmm…..A*MAZING! LOVE it! It’s one of those CDs you can pop the entire thing and just let it play. (Thanks, Jeff!)

(I still chuckle over his little foot bobbing up! LOL)

I LOVE my church! I love my Pastor! I love our church staff! Seriously, if you need a church home and you live in the Tulsa Metro area, come! It’s just so different…. Eastwood Baptist Church

Who is Jesus?

This was the question put to us this weekend. Who is Jesus to us?

This past weekend was one of those weekends that you need a week to recover from, but also one of those weekends that turned out so much better than you anticipated.

If I can be completely honest… I was not looking forward to this weekend. 24 hours with young teenagers, overnight, up late, up early, all day plans…..I figured I had offended Jeff in some way (probably this blog ) and this was his payback. An overnight with all the Youth will fix me right up…..tire me out so I would have no energy to blog….I know his evil plan…..

So all day Friday, I was planning for the weekend: packing overnight bags for all the kids, sleeping bags and pillows, making sure I had enough spare cash for Saturday…..and mentally, I was praying for some act of God to prevent having to do this. (I’m not proud of my reluctance, I’m only being honest about it. I’m a tired woman with too much on my plate…)

And I am totally ashamed of myself. Yes, it was work, but most things I do are, it was just a different kind of work. It was bonding with teenagers new to the department. It was getting to know them and their personalities. It was laughing over silly stuff and begging Jeff for chocolate chip cookie dough (thanks Jeff!). It was seeing these new, very young middle-schoolers worship Christ in a way that is different from Sunday morning. And it was seeing them learn how to share their faith…..and then seeing them apply that newly obtained information in public…losing their fear, and jumping in with both feet!

Like we learned from Michael, we can’t walk the walk, talk the talk, but not DO the dance! And anyone can go to a mall and share with strangers, but what about going to school (or work) and sharing your faith there? Your walk and talk must be held up by the dance you do. (Sharing your faith)

Living our faith, sharing WHO Jesus is to us, living a life the way Peter said to live….the world will hate us!

It’s funny that Michael would say this, the last few weeks, I’ve experienced that. If you ask any random person, they are all “Christians”…or what I lovingly refer to them as: country club Christians. But to actually put it to the test, get into an actual conversation with some, you quickly learn they have no idea what being a Christian means. When you hash it out, get down and dirty with it, you see who is really doing the dance, and who has no clue. I’ve had that opportunity lately to honestly have that conversation with people that have professed their faith, but when you shoved all the churchy stuff aside and let the truth swim to the top…..they are only Christian on the surface: a country club Christian happy to live life as they please knowing their fire insurance policy is up to date.

Word of advice for those afraid of offending people: do not point out the above fact to them. They do not like it very much, and you will no longer be welcome in their circles. Thank you, that “country club” may have revoked my membership…..

Anyway, I digress….

This weekend was perfect. It was exactly what we all needed. Thank you, Jeff for doing the work to pull it all together and letting me come play. Thank you, Michael, for allowing God to move in your life and spill out all over us who were priviledged to hear you. And thank you, Gordon, for taking Chandler under your wing and letting him watch and learn how to share his faith with boldness the way you do.

And when we were done on Saturday with all our Youth plans, I was able to go with this incredible Youth speaker, and shoot him and his team…

(Need a Youth speaker for a great Disciple weekend like this one? Check out Michael….he’s a good, GOOD guy!)

And yes, now I’m ashamed I wasn’t looking forward to this weekend. But as a reward for not bailing….or killing anyone….

….THIS was my reward….

…seeing and photographing my youngest son be baptized. Oh yes…Jesus is good to me, even when I don’t deserve it! (Look at that little foot bobbing up out of the water!) LOL

Do the dance!

Week 38: BLUE!

This weeks’ theme is BLUE.

I had the humble task of shooting a friend over the weekend for his new Youth Ministry. And I couldn’t resist the urge to use one of the photos for this weeks’ theme. These blue doors are simply yummy…. (that was for you, Mike! Thanks for letting me shoot you over the weekend! We pray daily for your Ministry!)

And I cannot thank iHeartfaces for teaching me TEXTURES! WOOHOO!! Click on their button to see the rest of the entries for this week.

Click on this weeks’ entry to visit Michael’s website!

And, as always, because I am a contributer, I am no longer eligible to win the contests…(I think)…but as always, I cannot resist the urge to enter!

A simple gesture

Years ago, Mike and I lost our first baby. I miscarried at 14 weeks and I was completely devastated. I didn’t have any truly close friends back then, just my family. My Mom was a dream, my rock. Even my sister came over and sat with me all day as I miscarried in my bedroom, scared and so deeply heartbroken. She knew what to do to help.

Those I went to church with sent cards or even a plant, but none of them knew what I needed to be comforted. One day, as I tried to cry in peace away from everyone’s sympathetic faces, in the safety of my own room, someone knocked on my door. I just yelled to Mike I didn’t want to see anyone, make them go away. If Mike could do anything, he could make anyone go away.

But 10 seconds later, I hear him chatting with someone walking towards the bedroom! WHAT!?! I said make them GO AWAY not bring them down to my room for International Coffees! And in the doorway walked the little, tiny Pastor’s wife. I loved Cherry, her name just fit her. Short of my Pastor’s wife now, Gloria, Cherry has been my very favorite of all the Pastor’s wives I’ve known.

I was mortified. Here I’ve been laying in my bed, bawling my eyes out, still in my NIGHTGOWN, and in walks the beautiful Pastor’s wife, perfect in everything.

She said not a word, but walked around to the other side of the bed, and climbed in. I cried on her shoulder for what seemed like hours, and then we talked and she reassured me of all of God’s promises. She knew I didn’t need her words when she first got there, what I needed was comfort. I didn’t need her sympathetic looks, I needed someone to crawl into the bed with me and cry with me. And she reminded me that what broke MY heart, broke God’s heart as well.

God sends us little reminders in the form of people to let us know that we are not forgotten. Our sadness, our worries, our concerns, are known by Him.

Tonight, as I left church tonight, someone asked how Mike was. Something so small meant so much to me. It let me know that someone remembered that he had missed church and he had a scary event last week with his heart and it had not gone unnoticed. Someone cared.

Having 2 young men leave church last week to come to my home to pray for him, and to let me know that someone knows.

These are probably small things, and only I would notice them because I am a hormonal woman, but these are such simple things that anyone could do to love and support someone else.

Cherry said something to me all those years ago. She said that she didn’t have anything special, no special talent, nothing she was really good at. I hope I told her this, but if I didn’t, I’ll tell her now: the talent she had that is so amazing, and so God-given, was her heart. Her heart that is just like Christ’s.

And it has challenged me all these years to try to be a better person. Listen when someone needs to talk. Be the shoulder when they need to cry. Be the support they need or the encouraging word. I’ve not always done a good job, but I’m trying.

Have you done that lately? Helped someone unexpectedly? Encouraged them? Cheered them on? Listened instead of speak? Made the phone call? Asked how they were doing? Let them know that you see, you hear, and you are genuinely concerned in their well-being?

Cherry, for that lesson to me, all those years ago. Thank you. Your talent outshines anyone’s.

The Baby door

I had the distinct pleasure of photographing my friend’s brand new baby girl. One week old. Brand new.

I dare you not to look.

So, obviously, the past week, I’ve been obsessed over BABY. Thoughts of babies. Dreams of babies. Pictures of babies. Clothes for babies. (Somehow everything always comes back to Gymboree, huh? Wait….I won’t go there. My Gymboree 12-step program has been working. Don’t look at it. Don’t smell it. Don’t think about it and it won’t exist. Hush, just go with me here…I do what I can to stay sane.)

And I’ve been looking for a new carseat for Brooklyn since she is quickly outgrowing her convertible carseat and needs to transfer to a bigger booster that will fit her til she’s roughly 18 years old. (You can drive in a booster right? I mean, isn’t that safer?)

And I’m finding myself drawn to all the little bitty baby seats with cute little strollers that match. I don’t need those, why am I drawn to those? Everything baby….

It’s odd to think I won’t have anymore babies. I won’t nurse anymore babies. No more new little baby stuff. No need for the pink bottle of Johnson’s baby lotion anymore. Why am I holding onto all the little burp cloths and baby towels?

When does that yearning to have another baby go away? Missing the pregnancy belly and the baby flips and turns inside? That sweet baby smell…..

It’s funny to know the door is closed. It’s odd to think I can move on from that spot. When we are young, we know that door is always open, our lives can change again with the coming of another baby, so we hover around that door, afraid to move past “just in case”. Always that “IF” at that end of the hallway: “if we had another baby” “if I happen to get pregnant” “what would we do IF” “can our lives adjust IF”.

So it’s odd to be able to move past that door and know it won’t happen again. I can look forward. I can fully enjoy every aspect of what’s going on here and where we are going in the future. Austin driving in 2 years. Making college plans. Chandler continuing his incredible academics, where it will take him. His last elementary year. Brooklyn starting school.

But also looking ahead: my job, my photography, where God is taking us, what our future holds, our health, growing old with my honey, our church and our roll in it. It’s kind of nice to look forward; to plan ahead; to enjoy everything.

And then you see the soft, sweetness of a new baby….

….and it all comes back. I think it’s in the smell. Nuzzling that neck and breathing in that yummy smell. The little squeaks. The contented sighs….

There’s just nothing like a brand new baby.

And boy did we love our new babies. Transformed Mike from a rough-around-the-edges MAN’S-MAN, to a soft and gentle Daddy who enjoys cuddling up with a napping baby on his chest, or making up Princess stories to tell his daughter every night. He cried at the birth of each of our babies. And he went from a man who doesn’t like to hold babies, to one that didn’t want to share his own. If I didn’t nurse, I’d never get to hold them. Yep, babies change a person.

I’d have 10 more if I could. Somehow we forget that these beautiful, tiny creatures turn into children and teenagers. LOL I want to do the very BEST I can for them, not having to settle for less, so perhaps having 10 more wouldn’t be the smartest thing. So I’ll move passed that door. See? I’m going….my feet are stepping….one.step.at.a.time…..passing that door that is closed…not gonna turn around…..not peeking……

I’ll just photograph them and sneak in some of that baby smell when the parents aren’t looking. And pray that God will help me NOT turn around and look at that door again. Help me keep my eyes focused on what’s ahead. There’s good stuff up there! Lots to be done up there.

And when I get homesick for that door back there, I’ll remember those soft, squishy newborns turn into mouthy teenagers. Turn into whiny 3 year olds who don’t want to wear anything but JEANS all the time. LOL

Life is fun isn’t it?

Week 37-”Completely Candid”

This week’s theme is Completely Candid: relating to or being photography of subjects acting naturally or spontaneously without being posed

There were several opportunities to take the posed pictures at the Pow Wow a few weeks ago. The dancers came out and would stand patiently for you to capture their photo….

….but that’s not at all what I wanted. How can you properly capture the image of a dancer….while they are standing still? So, I took very few of them posed.

I wanted the MOTION of their movements. I wanted the flying costumes. The serious expression of concentration on their faces.

And that is exactly what I got:

And let me just say, capturing the image of a DANCER while they are DANCING…..is NOT easy! But it captures the heart of what I wanted….

…..Completely Candid.

Click on the iHeartfaces button up top and check out the rest of the Candid shots! They are BEAUTIFUL!

I want to be a Man

I want to be a man.

Or a husband. Yes, most definitely a husband.

There. I said it. Outloud so everyone can read it. (Jeff’s out-of-town, so I can say this without serious repercussions from the Youth Minister. Just don’t TELL him I’ve revealed my deepest darkest secret. I’m a WHIZ with a filet knife, duct tape, and Tupperware. I can serve you to my children for dinner and hide the bones. Just sayin.’)

But I realized the other day, being a wife/mother can REALLY seriously suck sometimes!  

(I love my husband, I love my kids, that is not what this is about.)

I finally sat down after I’d worked a 9 1/2 hour day and the first words out of everyone’s mouth the second their eyeballs see my body in my chair is:

“What’s for dinner?”

Huh? Seriously? NOW? I just sat down! (If I had a dime for everytime I heard my Mom say that growing up. Sorry, Mom, for every time I asked the above question, I deeply, deeply apologize.)

I may have roughly about 5 minutes from the time the last child goes home, to sit and completely relax, all sprawled out, very unladylike, in my chair, usually with eyes closed. If I’m lucky I get 5 minutes. On Wednesday nights, because of church, I have to get dinner started at 4 for it to be ready by the time everyone is home. Then, the second Austin is home from football practice, and Mike is home from work, it’s tag-team showers, while the other is shoveling food in his face to even have a SHOT at making it to church in time.

Mike: comes home, leisurely walks around talking to all 3 of our lovely children. Forages for food. Then takes a nice, long, hot shower. Then, his butt meets his chair and he’s done for the night. Thank you, if you need me, I hold court right here….the children adore him. Here, Dad, I colored this for you….I made an A on this paper…..I farted in class today and it was the FUNNIEST thing, Dad……something something something FOOTBALL blah blah blah FOOTBALL, Dad…..

Puke.

I mean….uhhh….I’m not resentful AT.ALL. {whistling and looking around}

I get:

What’s for dinner? That again? I won’t eat that! That’s worm food, not even WORM FOOD, worms wouldn’t eat that either….That’s not nutricious enough, Mom, I have to have so many grams of carbs and so many grams of protien. Just make me a steak and I’ll eat that…..MOMMMMMMM!!! MOMMMMMMMMMM!!!!!! I NEED JUICE!……..I need jeans. No not THOSE jeans, there’s no designer label. You have a WHAT??? A COUPON? I can’t wear them if my friends ever found out they were bought with a COUPON!…….I’m out of lunch money again……..My gym/art/computer/math/english fee is due, I need X amount of dollars….THE DOG’S OUT AGAIN!

And that’s all while I’m cooking dinner.

The car needs gas, honey……can I have a few dollars for lunch…..do you have your part of the house payment yet?……..What’s that smell? Do you smell that?? It’s coming from over there…….

Whatever happened to: you look nice today, honey! Let’s go OUT to dinner tonight! WOW! Look at the house! You got a lot done today! Thanks, honey, I know how hard you work. I’m proud of you.

Where did all those words disappear to? I’m thinking they got lost somewhere in the afterbirth…..sorry to be so graphic.

I find myself hiding some nights. Different places sometimes, but always hiding. If they find me, they’ll show me papers requesting money, or schoolwork that needs signatures because it wasn’t done. They’ll whine for clothes, shoes, juice, a “chocolate” baby, and food. If they know where I’m at, something will need to be done/fixed/or found.

Dad’s in plain sight. See him? Right there!! No, of course, I don’t mind kissing the ouchies or holding someone when they are upset or sick. But more times than not it’s:

Why do I have to go to bed at blah blah time? Everyone else my age goes to bed whenever they want to……Mom have you seen my shoes?……. MOMMMMMM! There’s something gross on my sheets, I’m not sleeping here……..So and So touched me!……Mom tell him to STOP!……….

And just about the time all the angels are in bed, the house grows quiet, the teeth are brushed, the havoc from the day has finally stopped, and I’m sitting quietly in my chair again next to my handsome, stress-free husband, I hear:

Mom? Did you do laundry? I’m out of socks/underwear/my favorite shirt/shorts. Thanks, Mom.

Love you!

OK, I guess I will stay the Mom, at least for today. I kind of like snuggling with 2 of my kids in my chair. I like having my oldest son curl up next to me in the bed to talk about his day. Painting Brooklyn’s toes is pretty special. The hugs and kisses…..and it’s me they come to when they are upset. Maybe it’s not so bad.

But I may change my mind on Monday.

2 Angels at my door

I’ve noticed a change lately.

One I love to see.

We missed church tonight because we’ve had kind of a rough week. Mike has been having chest pains (of sorts) since Monday. He has been trying to save money……by taking his blood pressure medication only 3 times a week instead of everyday! I had NO idea he was doing this, and then he ran out of medicine completely last week and didn’t say anything. He cannot do this. It is dangerous for him to be doing this. Darn man.

Wait. That’s not what I love to see…..but it’s background for what I had to say.

Monday, I realized I had set back $100 for a bill, and then promptly forgot about it and paid the bill with other money. Mike was OVERJOYED to hear this because HE had been praying that God would provide the money for his medications! There was the money.

So tonight, we decided to take it easy and stay home and try to keep him as calm and relaxed as we could. I called a friend of mine to let him know that we would not be coming and why.

Now, in most churches, you’d expect for an older deacon to stop by, maybe the Pastor, but if we are really honest with ourselves, we expect…….no one to come. You’ll hear the “Oh, we’re praying for you!”.

But, who should show up on our door step? 2 of the young men from church, and by young men, I mean college age.

Gosh, he’s just barely out of high school! OK, maybe it’s his 2nd year of college, I’ve known this young man since he was in GRADE SCHOOL though!

These are the absolutely INCREDIBLE young men that showed up at my door to pray with us over my handsome honey.

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again. Our church has grown and developed into something far more than just a church. It is a community of believers that reaches out to its members.

And you would expect to see it with the older members of the churches, the Sunday School teachers, the Pastor and staff. But to see it in YOUNG adults? That is new. That is the power of Christ growing in our young adults’ hearts and changing not only their life, but the lives of people around them. It is exchanging their selfish hearts for the heart of Christ. It is seeing little buds of fruit blossoming and maturing on the Vine.

Now that is a beautiful thing.

Wanna know another beautiful thing?

Chandler went down Sunday morning to be BAPTIZED! So, in the next few Sundays, I’ll be able to PHOTOGRAPH the baptism of one of my OWN children!

{Dance of Joy}

And, even though the week has been so stressful with Mike’s health scare, God has been giving me all these little tidbits of JOY so my chest won’t collapse from all the pressure.

My very dear friend Hannah had her BABY yesterday!!! A gorgeous baby GIRL!

I missed her birth by MINUTES! ARGHHHHH!!! But it didn’t stop me from getting some jaw womb-dropping photos…

Daddy holding his brand new daughter for the first time….go ahead and cry, no one will know. (unless you are actually WITH them and taking pictures, then embarrassingly bawl like 4 times over things like cute little inky-feet….)

Makes you wanna have another one, huh Mr Daddy?

(That was subtle, huh, Rachel? ) They’re having a giveaway over there too, if ya wanna hit that link and grab you me something uber cool….

Maybe someone else will have a baby and I’ll actually MAKE the birth for the gooey-jelly-baby-first-photos. I don’t want any girlie bits in the picture, just jelly-baby…..still steaming from the oven. {sigh} What a sight….OK, someone get on this baby thing for me so I can photograph that….and then fly me out to wherever you are so I can catch it…..

I’m terribly off subject. Big shock. I’m just thankful for a God that is loving and kind enough to bring me through a scary week with more joyful moments than scary. A God that loves me enough to make sure I know He is still here.

And He’s still moving.

Week 36-Contemplative

This weeks theme is Contemplative: thoughtful, reflective, meditative.

I found this theme to be very thought-provoking…

Story behind the photo: a couple of weekends ago, we took the kids to their first Pow Wow which coincided with Cherokee National Holiday. We are proud of their heritage and wanted them to experience this beautiful custom.

Right before the Grand Entry, they presented a flag in honor of a fallen soldier that had recently passed away, who was also Cherokee Indian. This was one of the flag bearers. He stood in a row of 4 all wearing the same dress, the one next to him, with the bowed head, I believe was his son.

This man just spoke to my heart…..something about his expression of respect and honor and reverence. I’m so glad I captured it.

Click on the iHeartfaces button to see more entries!

And to go on the complete OPPOSITE end of the spectrum, as only boys can….

The Pet entry:

And yes, this would have been a PET had I succumbed to the pleas of the boys….

Also taken that same weekend while we were supposed to be inside at the family reunion. This is what my boys would rather be doing.

Dear:

Dear Jaclyn:

You are a Genius.

Pure Genius.

I received the hat I won in the giveaway, and it is simply DELICIOUS! Completely soft…

It wasn’t meant for her, but to use for photography, but Brooklyn had other ideas….

She has claimed it.

Now, you need to add baby coccoons and shawl infant wraps for portraits…. You are a Genius, and I thank you!

Sincerely,

Dana

(feel free to use the pictures if you’d like.)

(And any Etsy custom clothes/boutique designers need a photographer and a model? She wears a 3/4, and I work to keep the outfit only.)

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To the Makers of Excedrin, Allergy Medications, Serta, and Pepsi:

I love you.

Sincerely,

A tired, worn out Mom riddled with bouts of insane sneezing.

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To the Makers of MAC computers:

I am enrolling in President Obama’s Cash for Clunkers deal. But I want it for my computer. Pictures should not take so long to edit. Computers should not need to be restarted every flippin’ 8 hours for them to work correctly. I should not be receiving the “Windows is low on virtual memory” error message like acne on a teenagers face. Translation: CONSTANTLY.

I just want a computer that WORKS. I do have specifications of course: it must have TONS of space and the memory must be outstanding. Mine has alzheimers and it isn’t working out so well for me.

And it must be free.

You have a kajillion dollars, and I have…well…..about 27 cents. Nope….I was mistaken….Brooklyn stole my quarter…..I now have 2 cents. Penny for your thoughts?

Sincerely,

an over-worked Mom trying to make ends meet. Except, I believe the ends are found on opposite sides of the globe, so they can’t even see each other right now.

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Dear ABC, NBC, and CBS Executives:

There is way too long between seasons. And you are seriously overpaid, and are overpaying your actors. A million dollars a show is ridiculous. For that kind of money, I’d…..well….I won’t say what I’d do, but it would be something seriously entertaining.

By the time the season begins again, I’ve forgotten who George was and why I cried so hard when I realized he died.

Work more.

Sincerely,

A tired, worn out Mom who needs a distraction

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Dear sons:

Please close the door when you P*E*E. I don’t want to see your *J*U*N*K.

And look where you are going, please.

AIM for goodness sakes.

Sincerely,

The Mom who is going to secretly clean your *P*E*E mess with your toothbrush if it happens again.

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Dear Nikon Makers:

I want your D700 please.

Sincerely,

a Mom trying to suppliment her income and feed the kids.

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Maintenance for now is done until I can get my free computer from MAC. Wait, that probably won’t happen. {shrugs} So as soon as I can get the new pictures edited, I’ll edit the About me page. For now, I’ve updated some of the other ones.

And now, I’m off to stalk my blogs!