Yesterday, the mask came crashing down.

It didn’t go gracefully, or slip just a little, it crashed and broke into a million pieces. And it wasn’t pretty. Oh. It wasn’t pretty.

I am

Afraid.

Like, seriously, afraid. I hate saying that. I hate knowing that I am this good Christian person and yet I am still afraid. I’m afraid Mike won’t find a job in time to save our house. I’m afraid the pantry will go empy because there’s not enough to cover utilities and house and car AND food. I’m desperately afraid that Christmas is coming and my sweet beautiful kids will go without. I am afraid of losing everything we’ve worked so hard to get, and because my husband was laid off, we’ll lose it all. All that work….all that accomplishment….just…gone.

I

am

afraid.

Some things just should not be written…..and maybe this is one of those posts that shouldn’t have been written.

But where is the honesty in that? I’m a good person. I’ve given money to people I’ve never met before on so many occasions. I give snacks to homeless people. I have taken thousands of photos for so many people and never asked for a dime. I’ve just randomly done kind things to all sorts of people more times than I can count. I don’t drink. I don’t smoke. I don’t have s e x outside of my marriage. I don’t listen to “bad” music. I haven’t cussed in 18 months.

Yes, I did joke quite a few times yesterday about pulling a Dick and Jane* ….and Wednesday…..but it was only a joke, and just to make myself laugh.

But bad stuff happens all the time to good people! And I’m really not all that great……I’m mean sometimes just because people can seriously get on my last nerve…..Grrrrrr.

But the point is, bad stuff isn’t going to NOT come to good, Christian people. And good, Christian people can get angry. We can get scared. And we can scream at God. Sometimes a lot.

And loudly.

And cry. Very.very.uuuuugly crying…..not pretty crying…..like snottin’ all over the place, heaving, scary sobs that makes neighbor dogs bark. (Sorry Hannah. I may owe you a new shirt. heh)

But God isn’t watching from Heaven thinking “Gosh, Dana sure isn’t taking this very well…..I’ll let her sit a little longer….” or “WOW, forget it, Dana’s a mess, I’m not gonna use her after all….Peter, did you see the mess she made on Hannah’s shirt?? Forget it. I’m pulling the plug on her.”

We just studied on Sunday the story of Mary and Martha: Luke 10:38-41

As Jesus and the disciples continued on their way to Jerusalem, they came to a certain village where a woman named Martha welcomed him into her home. Her sister, Mary, sat at the Lord’s feet, listening to what he taught. But Martha was distracted by the big dinner she was preparing. She came to Jesus and said, “Lord, doesn’t it seem unfair to you that my sister just sits here while I do all the work? Tell her to come and help me.”

But the Lord said to her, “My dear Martha, you are worried and upset over all these details! There is only one thing worth being concerned about. Mary has discovered it, and it will not be taken away from her.”

Brian couldn’t have picked a better lesson for Sunday. One that would stay with me through the week, and was pertinent to our situation.

As a wife and mother, I totally understand Martha’s feelings. And it’s so easy to fall into that with all of the things that we have to worry about.

But my point on Sunday was Jesus reaction to Martha. In my head, when I read what Martha said to Jesus, it is full of attitude, exasperation, and fatigue…..all the same stuff I deal with all the time: I am tired, and I’m sick of working so hard all.the.time. And in my exasperation, I lash out sometimes.

But Jesus reaction was KIND. It wasn’t exasperated over HER exasperation…..it was kind. “My dear Martha…..” He wasn’t angry at her because she expressed her fatigue and frustration. He didn’t yell at her and tell her to back up and count to 10 before she talks to Him again because she better not ever use that tone with Him again….. {ahem}

Like yesterday, I sat in the car in my garage (garage door open, people, I’m not suicidal. LOL It was quiet there with no kids and I could scream and yell and cry without my family calling the men in the white coats for me. ) and I had a good fit with God. I said exactly what I was feeling, exactly how I was feeling them. Stuff better left unsaid here.

And very quietly, I received: “My dear Dana, you are worried and upset over all these details!” And in the rearview mirror, I see a suburban pull up in front of the house and I sat confused as to who would be here at this hour, and OMGosh, I am a MESS! LOL

And up my driveway walks my 2 closest friends.

I sat there dumbly looking in the rearview mirror at them til they had made it to the door and I was in shock. Even in my fit-throwin’, God heard me and had started working on my behalf before I had even walked out to sit in the car.

God had put things in motion before I had even realized I needed help.

So today, I’m reminded that I’m not alone. My prayers are, in fact, being heard loud and clear even before I pray them. And God does not hate me. LOL

And my fear is better today. I have to trust God and not get worked up about the details, I have to stay in the Word, and stay in prayer. And not lose hope.

Just keep praying for us! That’s exactly what we need. God is working and moving all around us, even when I’m stupid. And we’ll see where God is leading us….

*And by “pulling a Dick and Jane”, I meant the reference to the Jim Carey movie: Fun with Dick and Jane, at least, I think that’s the name of it. And it’s just a joke. I promise not to pull off any bank hiests.

EDITED TO ADD: As I was preparing to post this, God provided an entire house payment for December as well. Out of the blue, from an unlikely source. We’ve both been praying for God to show us His Almighty Power…..and He definitely is coming through loud and clear! Thank You, Lord Almighty!

I forgot to put this picture in with the previous post! It’s just one of those pictures that just makes me happy!

It’s a photo of my Dad and my sweet daughter Saturday night. He took her around the booths at the Fall Festival and I just loved the contrast between my Dad’s rough hands from years of working….and Brooklyn’s tiny, soft little girl hand. I love you, Daddy!

But still continue on to the next post to read the wonderful things God has been doing!

I know….it’s been DAYS! I’m rotten, I know. But during this time of uncertainty and (a little) worry, God has been doing some amazing things. In and of themselves, they are little, nothing like a sea being parted or my house being miraculously paid off by Matthew McConayummy because he was so thankful for the advice I gave a few posts back….

…but they are reassurances that God is definitely keeping His eye on us and He’s moving and working around us. And for me, that is keeping me breathing regularly.

Last week, I was trudging through Ezekial. Yes, I said trudging, I know that’s not nice, but my husband lost his job of 7 years, I’ve lost 1/3 of my income this week, and I’m having a difficult time reading about how God is going to punishment the Israelites. Yes, the deserved it. TOTALLY. But I don’t desire to read about it this week. So I came to a decision and I told God, I’m skipping it.

(and He DIDN’T strike me with lightning! LOL Can you believe my nerve?)

But I was going to skip it: I just can’t do it anymore, God. I’m sorry. I’ll come back to it, but I’m skipping it for now…..

And then I came to November 16th in my Daily Bible, Ezekial chapter 34 and I stopped completely. Let me share it with you (I’m only putting in certain verses because it’s LONG):

God, the Master, says: From now on, I myself am the shepherd. I’m going looking for them. As shepherds go after their flocks when they get scattered, I’m going after my sheep. I’ll rescue them from all the places they’ve been scattered to in the storms…..I’ll feed them on the mountains of Israel, along the streams, among their own people. I’ll lead them into lush pasture so they can roam the mountain pastures of Israel, graze at leisure, feed in the rich pastures on the mountains of Israel. And I myself will be the shepherd of my sheep. I myself will make sure they get plenty of rest. I’ll go after the lost, I’ll collect the strays, I’ll doctor the injured, I’ll build up the weak ones and oversee the strong ones so they’re not exploited.

You are my dear flock, the flock of my pasture, my human flock,
And I am your God.
Decree of God, the Master.’”

And I just sat. And I just stared at that chapter. And then I read it over and over. I am your God. You are my dear flock. He is our Shepherd. We have done a lot of reading of His Word, and a LOT of praying. My husband is spending just as much time in the Word and in prayer, as he is job-hunting.

And then God said, pray this chapter. Put it into prayer form and pray it. So I sat, put it into prayer form and have been praying it. And cried. And said I was sorry for telling Him I was skipping parts to please myself.

Heh. I’m not perfect. I’ve always said it. I admit my mistakes (publicly in a blog for goodness sakes) and apologize and carry on.

And then immediately after Ezekial 34, for the days readings was Hebrews 13 (which I’ve already read) and jumping out at me was (again I’m only including certain verses as this is getting quite long):

Stay on good terms with each other, held together by love. Be ready with a meal or a bed when it’s needed……Don’t be obsessed with getting more material things. Be relaxed with what you have. Since God assured us, “I’ll never let you down, never walk off and leave you,”

Make sure you don’t take things for granted and go slack in working for the common good; share what you have with others. God takes particular pleasure in acts of worship—a different kind of “sacrifice”—that take place in kitchen and workplace and on the streets.

Just in this last week, since Mike was laid off from his job, we have had the opportunity to share food and water, as well as Christ, with 3 homeless men, Chandler was able to do a Samaritan’s purse Shoe Box I didn’t think we’d be able to do, and we were able to help another family that needed gas money.

I don’t want to be the kind of person that goes through rough times, and loses my heart for other people. Not that I would ever do that…..ever….. We have next to nothing, I can’t share with you. I have to keep it for just in case…. I want to be the kind of person that trusts in God, and gives what I feel led to give.

And in this last week, these are the things that God has done for us:

Requests for photography sessions have POURED IN:

(thanks Kerrie and Travis!)

My favorite cake-baker in the entire WORLD made me a cake just because she likes me:

(Thank you, Jordan!) I may or may not have actually licked it right in front of her. heheheheh.

We have had 2 random people just give us $100. (I don’t have pictures of that. It’s in the savings account.)

I had a very nice person at church give me a new wallet! And it happens to have been bought in C@MBODIA which really just ups it’s incredible value all the more to me because it came from C@MBODIA….like, actually purchased in C@mbodia….And I won’t mention his name either so I won’t embarrass Jeff by calling him sweet. He’s gagging right now if he actually made it through this terribly long blog. He says I write too much. HAHAHAHAHA

And I had a random reader that just happened upon my blog offer to send me a new purse! And it’s really an adorable purse!

I’ve had people at church I didn’t even know come up to us in church to let us know they are praying for us! I’ve had friends stop what they are doing and pray with me. And I’ve seen my family pull together and concentrate more on what is truly important.

So, it’s a scary time if I’ll let it be. Or it can be a time for God to bl0w my socks off with His incredible blessings and love.

And I’ve chosen the latter.

Hug someone extra tight today. And when you see the homeless man on the side of the road with his sign that says “Will work for food”, instead of turning your head away and not making eye contact, give him a gift bag with snacks and a bottle of water. Maybe a pepsi or dr pepper if you’re extra blessed. And let him know that God loves him.

Dear Purse Thief Taker Borrower-without-asking:

Hi! My name is Dana as you can tell by my drivers license, bank cards, credit cards, and business information that you have in my purse. I’m sorry that I was unaware that you were going to steal borrow-without-asking my purse or I would have had some money in it for you! I’m also truly sorry that we are pretty poor here and all of my credit limits are so low on all of my credit cards, I’ll do better for you next time, I promise.

If you needed a tank of gas, I would have been happy to help you out had you only asked. But that’s alright, you have a nice, full tank of gas for your efforts, and trust me, with gas prices rising again, I KNOW how expensive that can be right there. I hope you were able to get to where you were going. But, by some chance, if you need a free meal tonight, swing by my church for a nice chili dinner! You don’t have to introduce yourself to me or sit with me at all. But if you choose to, I’ll be the one with obnoxiously pink hair. It’s a mid-life crisis thing….don’t ask….but I do stick out in a crowd! And I’d love to share a free meal with you.

I would love to share some of the things that were in my purse with you though. Well, other than the ibuprofen and Excedrin migraine, you’re free to have those. Anyone that has the need to steal borrow-without-asking purses, probably needs it more than my stressful life anyway.

But no, please feel free to rummage through there and check out some of the really cool stuff: I have LOTS of million dollar bills in there! No, they aren’t real, I’m sorry about that. They are Christian tracts for sharing the gospel with people! I know, cool, right? Right before we went to the park where you stole borrowed-without-asking my purse, I had prepared little goody bags for the homeless people with bottled water, snacks, and a little Bible. I was going to put in those million dollar bills and then later thought that would be mean, so I took them out. You can HAVE those! Read them! They are pretty awesome.

There are also lots of shiny coins. No, those aren’t real either. Sad, huh? I use those to share Christ with people. I have a hard time just blurting out my faith in Jesus Christ sometimes, and these help me do it. Feel free to look through there! There are English ones, and Spanish ones too, if you need instead. And I actually think there is one or two Chinese ones as well! I’m all multi-cultural in my witnessing.

I do believe there are also 2-3 small Bibles in there as well. I would love it very much if you’d look them over. See, even though Satan tried to use you to make my already-crappy-life-with-a-husband-that-just-lost-his-job even MORE crappier, God used it for good.

What you did was wrong. I hate to be the one to tell you that, but yes, it was wrong. Pretty sucky too. But see? I am a sucky, crappy person too! I don’t always do what is right either, and yet, God loves me all the same. And, something totally cool, He loves YOU just as much! I’m not a “feed the homeless”, “love everybody”, “help everybody” kind of person by nature. I’m a crappy person that was lucky enough to have found Christ. The CHRIST in me is what made the difference in my life. It made me want to be a nicer, kinder person that doesn’t steal borrow-without-asking purses. Although, I don’t really have the desire to steal purses….I’m more of the Gymboree thief. Ya know, if I were inclined to steal….it’d be Gymboree. Yes, that’s sad, whatever, I’m grasping for straws here.

I just want to assure you that there are NO hard feelings! Honest! The purse isn’t expensive so you can’t resell it on ebay or craigslist. It was a $25 splurge at Target, which, as you can tell by my lack of money in my purse or on my credit cards, it’s a lot of money for me. And the wallet? Doesn’t even match the purse. Crappy, huh? It was a $4 find at WalMart. And, thanks to you, I get to go out and buy a NEW purse AND a new wallet!! WOOHOOOO!! So thanks for that!

No hard feelings, honest. I forgive you. Truly.

But if you have any questions about the things you found in my purse, feel free to come to church tonight or email me. I’ll answer your questions for you. I hope you find some joy today!

I know I will! God has blessed me with having my purse stolen. Crazy, huh?

Love in Christ,

Dana

Tis the season to start thinking of Christmas cards. At my house, it means making sure the boys have clean clothes and find where they have tried to hide their dressier clothes for pictures. And forcing Brooklyn to wear a dress for me.

However, if you are asked to take photos for the Church staff Christmas cards, it’s totally different. So, because I am completely professional and never take a crummy photo*, I thought I would give back to the not-as-good-as-me photographers out there…..ya know, because all my photos are perfect and stuff*…….

How to take Church staff pictures:

1.) Ensure all cell phones are put away and turned off.

No, no….I said turned off…..

Wait….are those cell phones? Are you taking pictures of me taking pictures??

There we go….

2.) Ensure that you have everyone in the photo before you take the photo.

Hi William! Nice of you to join us. No, really…..I love your smile! We didn’t forget you at all. I promise….

Here we go, all phones are put away. All staff are present and accounted for:

wait…..what’s that back there? Jeff? What are you doing back there?

Oh geez……that’s nice. Because we’re all adults here…..

I quit……

Merry Christmas early.

*—by “perfect pictures” I mean…..I totally lied. I fly by the seat of my pants….

*—and by “never take a crummy picture” I meant I never post the crummy pictures. My computers full of ‘em. I just don’t share them.

So, for those that do not stalk follow me on Facebook, here’s where we’re at:

My husband walked in the door today at 1:15, roughly 3 hours and 45 minutes early from his job of 7 years. I asked him what was wrong because he never comes home that early unless he’s sick. And he looks at me and says:

I don’t want you to stress out……but I was laid off today.

Have you ever had one of those moments when your head suddenly starts swimming, your ears feel like they’ve suddenly filled with cotton, and your stomach just drops?

Yeah, it felt like that.

We’re one of those families that live pay check to pay check and have roughly about $37 in our savings. Yes, that’s dollars with NO zeroes behind it. We have no “safety net” or “family to lean on”. We can lean on them, but my Momma is little….I’d squash her. They are always there to “lean on” emotionally and spiritually, but as in helping out with bills or whatever until we get through this…..nope. We’re all alone there.

I am the one that tends to FREAK OUT. Seriously…like as in panic attacks. And for some reason, every time I feel that panic coming on, I get this peace. It may be shock, but I’m thinking it’s more along the lines of the Holy Spirit keeping me in check. There’s been several times in the last few hours that I feel that panic start easing up….like walking through WalMart tonight because book reports are not going to go away just because my husband no longer has a job….walking passed the electronics department and seeing all these games that are sitting on the boys Christmas list. I stopped in mid-aisle and just stared….panic easing it’s way up from my stomach……and there’s the Holy Spirit patiently holding my hand and walking me passed. Don’t panic.

Our house has been unusually quiet tonight and it’s a little eerie. I sat in my chair after Mike left on an interview and fill out applications, in the quiet of the house, and just sat and read my Bible outloud. I don’t do that very often, mainly at night when I put Brooklyn to sleep. But for some reason, reading it outloud is calming to me. It’s almost like I’m reminding Satan that I know the source of my being, the source of all we have, and the source of my joy lies with God Almighty. And all these little distractions….or major life changing moments….isn’t going to deterr me from the One I worship.

I just kept reading. All through Lamentations, and 10 chapters into Ezekial….I just kept reading outloud. I don’t know, it was as if I had to get the strength to pray. Does that make sense? And then I prayed. And prayed and prayed.

And after I prayed, I had my sweet friend Hanna call me and SHE prayed! Pulled over off the road just to pray with me on the phone. Then after she prayed, I got another call from one of our former youth and SHE prayed with me over the phone. One of the things that I will always remember, is her praying not just for a job for Mike, but one that supplies all of our needs and blesses us more than we ever expected or hoped for! Now that’s a prayer! LOL I was just praying for a JOB! LOL Now I’m repeating HER prayer! LOL I want that….that’s good stuff.

I called a few faithful people I trust to truly pray from church, and now we just sit. And we wait.

Mike is not one to go without a job for long. He’s already applied places, got the unemployment in line, and took his prescriptions to the Indian hospital to be filled so we will have no worries about his health.

I still feel numb and if I set my mind to it, I could freak out at any second, but if I concentrate on what I truly believe in, what I have put all of my faith in, Jesus Christ, then the ringing in my ears stops and the tears no longer threaten to fall. Here is the part where I prove myself. God doesn’t have to prove Himself, He’s already done that. I have to be willing and able to step up and trust my Savior. It won’t be easy, I know, but it must be done.

So if I start to panic, hand me a paper bag….and my Bible….and I’ll be alright. And please pray with me.

Father God, above anything else, You are faithful. Above all of our fears and worries and concerns, You are faithful. I thank You for always providing for us in the past, and I thank You for all the times in the future You will continue to provide for us. Even when I’m scared, even when I panic and can’t breathe….even in those times, I love You and I trust You. And I’ll try to remember that. Lord, I thank You for the job You have lined up for Mike; a job that meets every need, whether we know the need or not, it will supply it. A job that is steady and good. Lord, I ask for favor for Mike with every person he meets. Put his resume or application in the right hands of the right position especially for Mike. And I’ll ask, a salary that more than meets our needs. Holy Spirit, keep me calm. Give me strength and peace. Bring to my mind scriptures to give me hope and keep me focused on You. Guard my ears. Guard my mind and thoughts. Guard my heart. Keep stupid out of my mouth, please. Lord, we love You and we praise You, in the good, and in the bad. And we trust You. In Jesus precious and mighty name. Amen.

Dear Matt:

It pains me to write this. It pains me to have to admit this to myself, much less in public. (Children, close your eyes. My dear husband, plug your ears.)

I’ve grown bored with you. Yes, I said it. It is out there for all to see now. Your characters lately are stereo-typical, contrived, and frankly a little young for you now. Oh yes, I went there.

Every character you seem to play now is selfish, irresponsible, goofy, and terribly immature. Let’s take Fool’s Gold for example:

Granted, you looked yummy. (Sorry, I know, I’m terrible….I’ll repent) But I grew tired of the movie quickly because it was the same type of character. I was disappointed.

And we have Failure to Launch. Again, yummy….(yes, yes, I know…) but when Terry Bradshaw upstages you with his “nekkid room”, there’s an issue.

Oh I could go on and on….seriously, I could. But I feel a little tug on my “lust sensor” that could topple a MACK truck, so I’ll stop….

But it’s made me not even interested in seeing:

Sad. Tragic. Because if anything happened to my dear, handsome husband, I’d marry you next. I promise. But dude, seriously, you gotta get some new stuff! You are intelligent, you are talented, your accent is heartwarming, you are yummy (OK, honest, I’m done. ), and you can do so much better than the characters you are playing. Think of We are Marshall…

How about a nice serious role? A thriller maybe?? (I draw the line at another horror movie….WOW that chainsaw massacre monstrosity was torture enough….) But how about playing a good husband? A great father? Oh maybe a period film….like maybe from the 1700s or the Civil War period? A touching, feel good movie? Let me point you to Will Smith, have you seen Seven Pounds? Maybe Pursuit of Happyness?

I love you and I’m only thinking of your best interest. Honest. Maybe send your manager over here, I’ll have a talk with ‘em. Let me approve those scripts.

And I will still always, faithfully call you Matthew McConayummy. I promise.

But we don’t want you going down the “Val Kilmer” road, now do we? I still cannot watch Tombstone….delicious….”I’m your huckleberry…”

But I digress.

Focus, Matt. The potential is yours. And you aren’t getting any younger. Sorry, had to say it…had to go there…like a band-aid, just rip it off quick….you can’t play these roles much longer. Please. For the love of Peter. No more.

Sincerely,

Dana-your next wife

Dear ladies: (males are more than welcome to read, but this is to the females: girls, teens, and women)

Hi. My name is Dana, and I’m about to step on your toes. Feel free to turn around now, I’m a big girl, I can deal with it.

Let me address an issue that has been seriously irritating the snot out of me….to be blunt, and a little gross. You have b * o * o * b *s, I’m aware of that. I can see them. You have a b * u * t * t, I can see that too. But when I am sitting down behind you, I don’t want to see it. I don’t want to see your gross unders peeking out from the back, barely covering your ch*eeks. Seriously. Wear a longer shirt.

I am aware that it seems like EVERY top is now super low-cut, I get it. I have to buy my clothes in stores as well, so I understand. My “girls” are big and I have a difficult time finding shirts that do not leave them totally exposed, jumping out and introducing themselves to everyone. I’m right there with you. Let me introduce you to my little friend:

You put it on UNDERNEATH your top, and the “girls” stay where you put them, and no one’s eyes pop out of their head.

Or, another option that really works well:

The tube top. Yes, I was born in the 70s, I’m showing my age. I’m making the supreme sacrifice of revealing my age for the sake of stray b o o b s everywhere. Wear it underneath your revealing shirt and it covers up “the girls”. Yes, even in the summer. Sweat a little, that’s why we have deodorant.

Cover that stuff up. We don’t want to see it.

I have a young daughter, 3 years old, and now that she is getting to that inbetween stage of not-quite-baby, not-quite-children’s department, I’m noticing a HUGE shift in clothes for her.

Let me show you a few examples of Halloween costumes I was just accosted by in my indever to find a cute costume:

These are in the CHILDRENS DEPARTMENT! These are children’s costumes.

Ladies, please. Listen to me. Give me your full attention. If you dress your daughter like a wh*ore, good things are NOT going to come out of it.

Was that harsh? I feel that was harsh. I should probably feel shame for that. But here, let me continue instead:

Young teen girls, children, preschoolers, are not buying their clothes. Their mothers are. These type of costumes only bring unnecessary, and improper, se*xu*ual attention to our girls. And it teaches our girls that the only way we can get attention from boys is to dress like a who*re.

(I do think it is entirely possible, I just like to say the word wh*ore. )

We live in a sinful world, we do not need to add to it. We are teaching our daughters the art of manipulating boys by our se*xuality. We get angry with boys for looking, but we are giving them something to look at!

As the mother of a teenage boy, I want to walk around with him slapping my hand over his eyes everywhere he goes! He would have severe brain damage by the time he is old enough to drive a car! Instead, I’d like to walk around with him and slap the forehead of every young girl dressed like……well, you know the word I want to use. And then…..I’m comin’ after the mothers of these wh*ore-dressing babies…..

We want them to respect us. We want them to cherish us. We want them to be faithful to only one. We do not want to be ogled or manhandled or treated like a side of beef. But, what message are we giving them? Wake up. For goodness sakes…..wake up.

COVER UP.

And for those of us ladies that are saved by Christ Almighty? It’s causing men to sin. I can’t say it any other way. If we are knowingly contributing to their sinful lu*sts, we are sinning ourselves. We have to focus on things that are good, things that are right, and most importantly, we need to focus on our Savior. We are called to modesty. And as mothers, we have to teach our daughters the importance of that.

My name is Dana, and if you are lucky enough to go to Faithweek with me, I will be the one reaching over and physically pulling your shirt up. Or pulling your shirt down over the back of your pants. Or sending you back to your cabin to change those Daisy Dukes.

Because I don’t want to see all that mess.

Simply signed: Dana the Hormonal.

I am tempted by:

-ice cold Pepsi

-gooey chocolate

-a rainy day and a good book

-a handsome man….say like….oh, I don’t know, BRAD PITT. Yum.

(I only LOOK, but it doesn’t matter, shame on me)

-good juicy gossip

I know I am not alone in my temptations. All of us are tempted by multiple things….I’m just crazy enough to slap them up on a blog. Some of us have temptations with alcohol, some have temptations with drugs, and some have temptations with S * E * X. We are human, we are fallen, and we are being hunted.

1 Peter 5:8

Stay alert! Watch out for your great enemy, the devil. He prowls around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour.

Yesterday, in Sunday school, we talked about the temptation of Christ in Luke 4:1-13. I am not a huge theologian, so I wasn’t going to take the class too deep into it. I am a simple girl, with a simple mind….teaching simple teenagers, so I was good. Like I’ve said, I’m not Jeff, or Travis, or Mike…I do not get into theology. And since all the other teachers abandoned me to other things like sick beds, work, or church outreach…I was alone in teaching the Youth.

{evil laugh} Ahem, I mean….I did a smashing job!

We have to be on our guard, and we have to be filled with the Spirit in order to combat this determined enemy. In every temptation of Christ, He came back with scripture. That is significant! If we don’t read the Scriptures, how are we going to be armed adequately enough to conquer an enemy like satan? We have to be in the Word.

Satan first tempted Jesus with His physical desire for food: turn the stones into bread. First, it’s doubting that God will supply our needs.

Ouch. Sorry, was that your toes or mine?

Secondly, Satan is wanting Christ to think of His own selfish desires. Most temptations, if not all, deal with our selfishness. Our temptations always look good, always smell good, always are desirable. And it always has undesirable strings attached. But it’s temporary satisfaction. Our satisfaction comes from Christ alone. Jesus was HUNGRY, bread would have been very nice at that point. Satan looks for our weak, vulnerable times to attack.

And, Jesus replied with…….Scripture. Holy Spirit giving Him strength.

Next, Satan tempted Jesus with what so many people seek: power, authority, prestige, control, pride…..You can be ruler of ALL of this…..if only You will bow down and worship me.

I have to admit, for a second there, I had a little black girl moment: he said WHAT?!?!

Did Satan not get the handbook? He, KINDA doesn’t have the power to do that….he has temporary control of the earth, but only what God allows. God always, always has ultimate control. Duh.

The third temptation was a test of God. If You jump, see if God will send His angels to protect You like the Scriptures say…. We aren’t to be manipulative and that is what Satan was attempting to get Jesus to do.

And Gordon would have been so proud: I gave them the 3 F’s to remember:

FLEE-run away from the temptations we face! Don’t put yourself in the situation to begin with, but after you are already there, GET OUT OF IT.

Focus-focus on things that are GOOD, and RIGHT! Focus on our Savior, stay in the Word. We are less tempted when we are occupied with GOOD things and doing what we are supposed to do.

Fellowship-surround ourselves with like-minded people. I am less tempted to get myself into trouble when I am with fellow Christians who are also pursuing GOOD things. (Christians can lead each other into a mess just as well as anyone else, don’t mistake this statement.) I encouraged the teens to find an accountability partner to help them in times of temptations, someone they trust.

Finally, our object lesson I was really excited about, and really really hoped they didn’t find me totally lame. I asked them to take the cardstock and write in big letters what their temptations are, what is it that distracts us from doing what we should. I wasn’t sure how this would be welcomed, quite honestly. But I was pleasantly surprised when they broke off into their groups and began an excited chatter around the room.

I then told them, I want to take a photo of what they wrote. I didn’t want a picture of them, but of what they wrote. For me, knowing the kids, it was one of those beautiful, proud moments. It was an open and honest look into their lives. Some, I had a little chuckle over. Some I wanted to sit and cry over.

So I’ll leave you with a look into the lives of some of the struggles our teenagers are dealing with:

Father God, I am humbled by their openness. They are young, 16 and younger, and yet, they are dealing with the same issues so many of us grown adults are. Lord, I ask that You will protect them. Guard their hearts, guard their minds, guard their eyes and ears. Holy Spirit, I ask that You will bring to their minds Scriptures that will help them in every circumstance. Give them courage and strength. Send someone to encourage them, hold their arms up for them when they are tired and weak. Lord, I ask that You will surround them with friends and influences that will encourage their walk with You, not distract them. Lord, You are always faithful to us, show each of these young teenagers this. Help us as teachers to be there for them, and love them, give us Your words for them. Keep us always accountable in doing what is right. Father God, I love You, and I thank You for all that You have done and all that You are doing, and that You will do. In Jesus mighty name. Amen.

WARNING:

This post shows mild nudity! (all parts ARE covered though. You see more on a public beach than you’ll see in the photo ) If you are easily offended, PLEASE, I am begging you, do not proceed. The photo shown is beautiful, inspiring, and, as has been the case for several people, may make you cry. HOWEVER, this photo does have nudity in it. If this is offensive to you, please, feel free to close the post now, I will not hold it against you.

When I first had the idea for the photo, I wasn’t even sure I could do it, it was so far removed from my norm. So when I broached the idea to the woman’s daughter about doing the photo, she emphatically told me her mother would NEVER agree to it. I wasn’t going to push it because, frankly, I wasn’t sure I could do it. I am the Queen of Modesty.

But when I spoke to the woman herself, she told me she loved the idea and she’d love to participate. And quoting her:

“I’ve beat cancer. I can do anything!” And the smile on her face told me, not only could I do it, I almost had to! Hers is a story, and a triumph, worth sharing.

Gail had a regular mammogram in 2002, when they found the lump. Within days, she had an ultrasound and a needle biopsy where it was determined it was indeed cancer. Within a week, she had a mastectomy. She’d been through this fight with her mother, and again with a close friend, so by the time she traveled the road herself, she knew what her decision would be, and she knew instantly.

Gail is amazing. I hope the photo portrays that. She is amazingly strong, but in a gentle, sweet way. (Is that an oxymoron?) I love her eyes, they show her softness, but what her hands reveal is the battle she fought…..

…..and WON!

I debated doing the photo at all, but if her story inspires even one person, gives just one person hope, then it was worth it. Yes, it is revealing. Yes, it shows too much skin. And yes, decidedly, I may have crossed that line. But cancer is not pretty. It does not discriminate where it hits. It is not soft or gentle. It is devastating and awful.

And for some, one that can be conquered.

And I believe if you look in Gail’s beautiful eyes, you will see the beauty behind her battle.