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From chaos to Grace…

From chaos to Grace…

Monthly Archives: June 2009

Just bed…

30 Tuesday Jun 2009

Posted by Dana in Uncategorized

≈ 14 Comments

Tags

cake, cake wreck

I don’t want this post to be crude in any way.

Really.

I’m not a crass person by nature….

…but some things just make you go…

“HUH??”

I’ve had a rough couple of weeks with some worries and stress, so Sunday evening when I went to the store to pick up a lonely little loaf of bread for hot dogs, I decided to totally splurge and buy a little cake from Reasor’s. (I know Reasor’s is exlusive to Oklahoma, but OH MY their cakes are just *D*I*V*I*N*E! If I can’t get a Jordan homemade cake, I head for Reasor’s, better than Merritt’s! Yes I said it, and I’ll stand by it too…..)

Anyway, so I’m picking out this cake just big enough for 6 pieces to be cut, and the baker asks me if I wanted anything on it. Gosh, think fast…..it’s gotta have SOMETHING written on it, right? So, I told him SURE! Write “JUST BECAUSE” on it. It’s a cake “JUST BECAUSE” I’m depressed and I want to eat cake.

(So many, many psychological issues in that statement….)

The little baker man even spells it out for me. Seriously. Like he was mentally going over it in his head to make sure he got it right.

Should have been my first clue. 😉

So, he’s writing, and I’m admiring the lizard cake they had (wish I had my camera in the store), seriously second-guessing the fate of humanity at the bikini cakes they had, complete with monster-size breast implants made of cake….and a belly ring. I’m not kidding. They were atrocious…how do you cut into something like that?? “Here Grandma, would you like the crotch piece or the nipple?”

{shudder}

Again, I have a hard time staying focused with this….so many rabbit trails I could travel…

I’m waiting for him to finish my cake and I hear this:

“OOPS.”

“What? What oops?”

“I can fix it.”

“Fix what?”

“I kind of got the words wrong.”

Mentally in my head….how can you get “JUST BECAUSE” wrong??

I told him I’d like to see it, and when I did, I laughed so hysterically I had to wipe my eyes from the tears streaming down my face.

And I told him I didn’t want it fixed, I wanted the cake JUST as he had written it.

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No, your eyes are NOT deceiving you….that IS what it says….have another look:

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How can you be depressed after seeing that?? I figured it was God’s little pat on the head that it’ll be alright.

Or someone was gonna get lucky. 😉

I can’t make this stuff up….

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iHeartfaces-week 25-Wedding

29 Monday Jun 2009

Posted by Dana in Uncategorized

≈ 8 Comments

Tags

iHeartfaces, photography contest, wedding photography

I don’t do weddings, I’m just not qualified and not equipped to do weddings. So when 2 different brides called me and begged me to do it, I said “no, please find someone else”.

And both talked me into it. I’m a sucker, what can I say. So I have done 2 SMALL weddings.


(button will take you to iHeartfaces if you click on it)

She was just so serene, so peaceful sitting there, trying to calm her nerves. It was one of those moments that you knew you would break the spell if she knew you were taking the photo. I love the perspective of it, the quiet of the moment, and the surreal feeling to it.

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I’m still not qualified or equipped to do weddings….so don’t ask….or beg. I mean it…. 😉

Kindness

27 Saturday Jun 2009

Posted by Dana in Uncategorized

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

Elisha, kindness, prophet

Several years ago, at the church we previously attended, my friend and I saw a huge need for our church and decided to fill it. We didn’t go through the “committees” or ask everyone, or even start a committee discussing the problem and possible solution, we just did it. (After we discussed it with the pastor, so someone would be there to unlock the doors for us during the week.)

Our church was relatively small, and could only afford a part-time janitor who came up once a week to clean the church. The church was small, however, it still had 200-250 people going through it several times a week and needed more of a clean than a part-time janitor provided.

So, 5 days a week, 6 hours a day, as soon as our older children were in school, we arrived at the church to clean. We stripped and scrubbed down beds in the nursery, and sanitized all the toys. We cleaned preschool and children’s departments rooms, washing the tables, peeling off glue, vacuuming glitter off the floors. We straightened up offices of the staff. Organized storage closets. Washed dishes left in the kitchen and mopped the floor. We cleaned 5 different bathrooms, mopped the floors, and scrubbed sinks and counters, and encountered more than one toilet I cringe to think about.

And once a month, we set about the task of scrubbing down the beautiful wooden pews til they shone. Normally, this job was only done once a year because of the magnitude of it, but we managed, just the 2 of us Moms, to do it once a month.

And before major parties or weddings and funerals, we would sneak up the day before and do an extra good clean so it would be especially nice.

And….

…no one knew we did it but the pastor and his secretary.

We did this for 9 months straight because it was needed. We did it even through our personal struggles in the church. We even continued to do it even when we heard others taking credit for it. We continued it as a service to our Lord.

No pay.

No credit.

That’s not easy to do sometimes. Sometimes it’s just plain hard. But the need was there and we could fill it. I’m not even sure they know to this day what happened in those months….the little church elves came at midnight and cleaned, who knows what they thought.

God used 2 Moms who were blessed to be home to do something good for someone else. In this case, it was a lot of someone elses.

And tomorrow in Sunday School we are talking about Elisha and the Shunammite Woman. (It helps that I’ve read this in the last week on my own. LOL) Elisha came several times during the year to preach to her town, and she saw that he had a need of a place to stay. So her and her husband built a room for Elisha to stay in whenever he needed it. Elisha, had nothing in return he could offer her, but that wasn’t her intent. She saw a need and she filled it.

God, knowing her deepest desire for a child, granted her wish, and I believe, because of her kindness showed to Elisha. God blessed her.

It’s one thing to be nice to someone who can better your career, pay you back, or move you up the social ladder. But it’s an entirely different thing to show kindness to those that will never pay you back. Those that cannot prosper you in any way. And sometimes, it’s just difficult when it’s a sacrifice for you personally.

(I have to say, I think this lesson was a little chuckle on the part of God for timing this at this particular time…..I never have a problem helping others, but there are times, I need help in return, and I’m struggling with that right now. God does have a sense of humor.)

So go show some kindness to someone who won’t expect it, may need it but doesn’t know how to ask, or just do it because God tells you.

Have a good weekend!

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Stolen opinion on Michael Jackson

27 Saturday Jun 2009

Posted by Dana in Uncategorized

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

blogs, Michael Jackson's death

I’ve abandoned many of my blogs.

I’m just sayin’.

Blogs like MckMama’s or even a few of Pioneer Woman’s….LOVED reading them, but they are too huge and they post way too often for me to keep up.

I’m just being honest.

The BIG BIG blogs I just feel lost in.

I like the NORMAL blogs. Pam, Shanda, Heidi, Suzanne, Rachel, Beth….these are the type of blogs I enjoy reading.

So let’s take a look at one today, shall we? Let’s took a closer look at Heidi.

She said exactly what everyone’s thinking, and I loved it.

Enjoy.

He’s Dead, Jim.

Yk what? I have an opinion about Michael Jackson dying. I’m tired of the 24/7 coverage of his death and the “mystery” surrounding it. Let me break it down for you, mmmmkay?

He sang.

He mutilated himself.

He MAY/or may not have molested little boys.

He mutilated himself some more.

He died.

The end.

Carry on.

Stop giving him some Hero’s funeral. The man is a pedophile and the only reason he wasn’t convicted is because the world runs on Cash and he had it.

He’s dead. Sad. Sorry. Move on.

Every day our military men and women deploy to unknown areas for things they have never seen nor experienced before. We pray they come back, but when they do they generally come back completely different people than when they left us.

But let’s talk about Micheal Jackson dying, shall we?

The unemployment rate is higher than it’s been in decades. People can’t find a job and are losing the ones they have faster than you can blink, every day.

But let’s talk about Michael Jackson dying, shall we?

Housing are being foreclosed on. Business are closing. People are laying off workers and people are losing their livelihoods. Every day.

But let’s talk about Michael Jackson dying, shall we?

Really? Seriously? Honestly?

Really: Nearly 100,000 men and women have DIED in the Iraq War, to date and documented.

Seriously: The unemployment rate was 9.4% in may. That means that nearly 10% of the population has filed for unemployment.

Honestly: 6% of people have had their homes foreclosed on this May.

But let’s talk about Michael Jackson dying, shall we?

Look – the man was a weirdo. He was a freak. He had a bad childhood and was just completely whacked out..at best. At worst he was a pedophile and a child molester. The fact is, he died. Sad? Sure. It’s always sad when someone dies. But put it into perspective okay?

In the reality of all that is going on around the world today, MJ dying is not even a drop in the bucket.

That’s my story, and I’m stickin’ to it.

Giddy up.

I couldn’t have said it better myself, Heidi

A closed door…

25 Thursday Jun 2009

Posted by Dana in Uncategorized

≈ 3 Comments

Tags

Experiencing God, missions

God’s great task is to adjust His people to Himself.  (Meaning me,  He’s adjusting me.)   It takes time for Him to shape us to be exactly what He wants us to be.  Suppose you sense God is going to do something great because of what He has said to you in His Word in prayer.  You sense He is going to do it because of the way circumstances are working out and other believers (the church) agree.  Then six months pass, and you still haven’t seen anything significant happening.  Don’t become negative, depressed, or discouraged.  Watch to see what God is doing in you and in the people around you to prepare you for what He is going to do.  The key is your relationship with God.  The God who initiates His work in a relationship with you is the One who guarantees to complete it.

God is preparing ME.  God is molding ME into the person He can use.   He is growing and stretching me into an obedient servant. 

And I am willing. 

That has not always been the case.  😉   I don’t get outside my comfort zone.  I don’t do things purposefully to make myself uncomfortable.  I just don’t.  Some things are just difficult for me to do.

So when I felt God was calling me to go to Mexico with our college class at church, I jumped at the chance! 

I’m reading the Word everyday.  I’m in heavy prayer everyday.  I’m being obedient to Him….

He wanted me to get a passport, He provided the means to do it.  I have a passport.   I was obedient.

And then things seemed to fall apart.  It started off in small ways, but enough that it grabbed my attention.   My fundraiser to provide some funds for the trip, I thought was such a smashing idea, fell through in several ways and I was totally disheartened and felt let down.  

Lord, if You want me to go, what in the world is going on?

And then it was brought to my attention that I was trying to help God.  Did God tell me to do this fundraiser?  Uhhhh….no.  That was all my idea.  It was something I could do.   I have this “workers” mentality that I have to do it.  If it needs done, I have to do it.   If I am able to accomplish something to make the road easier/stronger/provided for, I have to do it.   In effect, I was trying to help God.   I was trying to show God my willingness to do something and to help, and that’s not what He told me to do.  

I was trying to put my little scribble on it.

The Mexico trip was not for ME to show or prove what I could do, but for God to move and work in the situation.

So, am I not going because of my disobedience or my meddling? Who knows. LOL Am I being punished? I don’t think so. I was still obedient to His call and He knows that.

He called. I answered with zeal.

However, circumstances have closed the Mexico trip for me. At least for now. God is fully aware of my job and the needs of my family. I do not believe He would go against either of those and jeopardize those without opening other doors.

I’ll be saving what money I received towards THIS trip, for the next one…..because I do know there will be a next one.

Am I sad? Maybe a little, but I have a peace about it. God is set on maturing me and I am willing to let Him do it. I know this was part of some lesson for me in trusting God. And every morning, I’m still reading my Bible (let me just say, 1 Kings and 2 Kings are awesome! LOL) and I’m still praying. For now, I am going back to God to clarify what He said, and what may have been MY additions to what He said.

And I am waiting on the Lord to show me what to do next….

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Not for the squeamish…

23 Tuesday Jun 2009

Posted by Dana in Uncategorized

≈ 7 Comments

Tags

extreme sunburn, Mother, son, sunscreen, teenager

WARNING:

This post portrays a teenager who did NOT listen to his Mother. As a result, gross photos are to follow. If you are pregnant, nursing, or over 60 years of age, or have a light stomach, please do not proceed without a doctor’s written statement.

heh.

So, Saturday we were invited to go swimming. We don’t get to do that very often, so we were excited! I bring my sunscreen, apply to myself and Brooklyn, and Mike applies it to himself. I hear from the boys: I don’t need that stuff.

That is important for later.

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We swam, played stupid pool games….the kids too…. 😉

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…floated on inflatable stuff…

…showed our rippling muscles and stellar football poses… {cough cough} (no comment from ME…)

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…had lunch….reapplied sunscreen.

Mom: Austin, are you SURE you don’t want to put sunscreen on? A sunburn is NOT fun!

Disobedient teenager: No, I’m fine, I don’t burn.

Wise and Wonderful Mother: You don’t burn because I always put sunscreen on you without asking….

Disobedient, not-listening teenager: Nope, I’m fine.

And we resume our swimming and frolicking…

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….until we are waterlogged and exhausted.

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We arrive at home to find…..sunburns.

You were shocked weren’t you? You had NO idea I was gonna say SUNBURN did you?

heh.

😉

So we apply aloe with lidocaine and send our tired children to bed.

Only to find THIS in the morning:

(cover your eyes…)

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And one very humble teenage son in a lot of pain.

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awwwww….sad huh? We are all filled with remorse on the loss of Austin’s common sense…..

Aloe with lidocaine is not gonna cut it, so we buy the GOOD burn stuff which goes on as a SPRAY so no one will have to touch his grossness sunburn. And he refuses to wear clothes. In fact, I do believe he is still laying upstairs in the same shorts he put on Saturday night….

And then Monday morning, we awake to find THIS:

(again, NOT for the squeamish….this is your warning)

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Yes, my big ol’ fat finger to show you the size of these “bubbles”! They are monstrous! At least to one who is unaccustomed to sunburns because I am the LOVER of sunscreen and INDOORS. 😉

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I can hear SHRIEKS of “UNCLEAN! UNCLEAN!” in the streets….

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Perhaps that was mean….my poor little leper…. 😀

The white stuff is prescription burn stuff, in case ya’ll think I’m totally horrid.

And you can believe, not ONCE have I said “I told you!” Cross my heart and pinky swear….

Who am I kidding…of course I did. What kind of God-fearing mother of the year would I be if I didn’t say it at LEAST once. 😉

He is a good sport, and feeling much better today. Better enough to have DARED to touch my camera. LOL The little rascal has enacted his revenge on me…

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And I have 3 kinds of sunscreen for him in the future. 😉

He is now a lover of sunscreen too.

iHeartfaces-Week 24

22 Monday Jun 2009

Posted by Dana in Uncategorized

≈ 17 Comments

Tags

iHeartfaces, photography

In honor of Father’s Day yesterday, this weeks’ theme is “Let’s hear it for the boys”, totally MALE entries! YAY!!

So, this week, I’m entering a photo of my sweet, dear husband….PLOTTING something with my equally sweet, dear sons….I’m not altogether sure what they were discussing, I only know it was ALL male oriented, and something I’d be shaking my head over. 😉 I know them all very well. And who knows what took place after this photo was taken. LOL I shudder to think…

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A few weeks’ ago, I was honored to do baby portraits for a friend of my husband. They both do MMA-style karate, and both tough as nails, so to have that contrast of tough, rugged male, partnered with precious, innocent, soft baby….I had a BLAST!

So I chose this photograph of father and new son.

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Transparent

18 Thursday Jun 2009

Posted by Dana in Uncategorized

≈ 4 Comments

I’m gonna be transparent for a minute…

….totally and completely open and honest because I don’t know what else to do.

I’m confused and frankly feel pretty dumb, and of course, I have to write about it. LOL

After last week’s incredible MOUNTAINTOP experience, I’ve had a rough coming home. God hasn’t changed, and really, I haven’t changed, it’s just been rough.

My friend’s 14 year old passed away very unexpectedly over the weekend, and that’s been difficult to accept. I know where he went, and I’m at peace with it, but as a Mom, it’s hard to swallow.

And then, reality just hit me hard over the weekend: how am I going to pay for Mexico?

Faithweek was difficult enough, losing a weeks’ wages (remember, I’m self employed, I have no vacation days or sick days) and factor in the cost of the cabin stuff, gifts for the girls, party stuff, cleaning supplies, etc….well, it wasn’t easy. God definitely provided for me to be able to do that, and provided a scholarship for Austin to go, but how in the world am I going to lose 2 weeks worth of wages in a months time for a mission trip? I haven’t even been able to come up with even 1/3rd of the money to GO!

I’m not whining.

Really, I’m not.

I’m trying to be faithful. I’m staying in prayer. I’m staying in the Word.

But I’m also using the common sense God gave me. I’m not one of those people that believe God waits til the last second to bail you out of trouble. Yes, I’m sure He has, and sometimes He does, but I also believe He is a loving Father who loves His children desperately and would not cause His children undo stress and worry. Yes, in some cases it builds faith. But I just can’t believe my loving Father would sit back and watch us fret unnecessarily. I think He also expects us to use our common sense.

I don’t know, I reasoned it out in my head….now I don’t know if anyone will understand it.

I have to let the church know SUNDAY if I’m going to be able to go. I’m frankly scared of losing 2 weeks worth of pay ontop of losing a weeks’ worth of pay last week. That scares me. It scares me a lot. My kids like to eat.

Who am I fooling…I’m fond of eating too…

So that’s where I’m at….

Did I miss it?

Did I mess up and NOT hear God calling me to GO? Was He saying something else and I was wrong? That fact that He called anything and I was willing is somewhat of a miracle in itself, but to WANT to go, and then not be able to go….well….I just don’t know about that.

So I feel dumb. I’m embarrassed to have possibly gotten it wrong. And I frankly don’t know what to do about it. My faith is strong, it really is, or is it? Is my faith just lacking and I’m too thick to realize it? Do I tell them YES I’ll go, and then risk being out of God’s will and risk serious financial problems because of it? Or do I tell them NO, I can’t go, and again, find myself out of God’s will, and I missed it again?

Confused yet?

Don’t worry, so am I.

Can I ask for a burning bush? Something clear? Is that wrong? I’m so scared of doing something WRONG when my heart is so willing to please God.

Maybe I just had to get to the place where I was willing….maybe He wanted me in the place where He can ask, He can tell, He can instruct, and my answer would be “YIPPEE!! Here I am! Send me!” I’m so there…

So, in the middle of my prayer time this morning with my crying and trying to get some kind of clue from God what I’m supposed to do, my cell phone rings. One of my Youth girls who I counseled with last week called me just to tell me she FOUND IT!

And my first thought was, HUH? LOL Found what?

“Remember, the Bible? You said 2 separate times last week to find the Bible I can read and understand and READ IT. I found it! I’ve already been reading it….”

And while I was writing this, sitting here pouring out all my confusion, my phone rang again, same girl…..this time, questions about sharing her faith.

So, I guess, in the end, even if I don’t have the right answers for whether or not to go to Mexico, I do have the answer that what I’m doing HERE, where I’m applying myself HERE, all the hard work I’m putting in right here, is effective.

And someone is listening.

Praise God.

So please, this weekend, say a prayer for me. I gotta have some answers….

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I WON!!!

17 Wednesday Jun 2009

Posted by Dana in Uncategorized

≈ 5 Comments

Tags

iHeartfaces, Kramer, photo contest, photography

Remember my entry for the iHeartfaces blurb book?

I entered THIS photo?

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Well…..it just so happens…..

I WON!!!!!

Not first place, and that’s alright, there were LOTS and LOTS of entries! But I was one of the 20 chosen to be PUBLISHED IN A BOOK!!!! How flippin exciting is that?? And this is not one of those “Send-us-your-photo-and-$75-and-you’ll-be-“published”-in-a-book”, this is for REAL! WOOHOO!!

Don’t believe me? Check THIS out! Under PROFESSIONALS, and mine is the FIRST name given after the 1st place winner is announced! 😉 I’m LEGIT baby! LOL

How come all I can think of is Kramer’s coffee table book? Ya know, that’s a coffee table? Went on Regis and Kathy Lee to show it off? BAHahahahahahaha! I need to get me a plaid suit jacket…

Anyway, I’m excited and honored and a lot shocked! LOL

I’d like to think God Almighty for the talent to do this….my Mom for believing in me……Mike for supporting me….. 😉 I’m just kidding, I’m not giving a speech. 😉

OK, maybe in my own head I am…..I don’t get out much, alright?

No words…OK maybe a few…

16 Tuesday Jun 2009

Posted by Dana in Uncategorized

≈ 3 Comments

Tags

Brad Fogarty, church camp, Eastwood Baptist Church, Faithweek, teenagers, Tulsa Oklahoma, youth

Camp.

Wow. There is just no real words to describe it really. It is amazing, but that just doesn’t seem to cover it sufficiently.

How do you describe seeing teenagers go from “just” teenagers, to teenagers so in love with God they can barely contain themselves?

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What word would you use for that?

Is there a word that can adequately express the feeling of the Holy Spirit over a place? The expression on a face or the posture of a body in total love and abandon to our Mighty Creator?

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To see bondage and sin they carried into the room…..

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….drop like balls and chains to the floor….there is not even words in our human language to express it. There is nothing.

I was able to counsel with numerous young ladies throughout the week, and make close bonds. I do believe I have a few more “sons” and “daughters” to add to my family. LOL Several just wanted to come home with me….and I would take them in a heartbeat.

I have to say, I thank my Father God for allowing me to do this. For giving me the words to say, the verses to share, the prayers to pray, I thank Him. Without Him, I am nothing. I would be just another person on this already crowded planet using up air and making more trash, with a one-way ticket to hell. His mercy saved me. His love made the way possible. And I am in awe He would use me.

There were moments I felt overwhelmed and quite a few times I cried over the magnitude of it, and when those times came, I prayed.

And He answered. I didn’t have my “Grumpy Day” this year! I didn’t have the day I was so tired I couldn’t function without a headache and biting someone’s head off! So thank you to everyone who lifted me up in their prayers! They were NEEDED! I was clear headed and focused on the tasks I had in front of me!

My sweet friend that teaches Sunday School with me, my partner in crime, was unable to go this year, so a stand-in had to be found to help out as much as she could.

I have another partner in crime. 😉 That’s all I’m sayin’….

But I knew several ladies had things they were dealing with, a few ladies who are probably not saved, and all of them needed a fresh touch from the Holy Spirit, so every service, I sat by someone different. And some services were minutes apart, so I’d have to get up and move in between. LOL I wanted to be available to anyone who needed me. I was able to pray with most of them one on one, and those who I missed, I prayed with in small groups.

Oh, and somewhere in the mix…..I took photos. I’m not sure how God worked that out, but He did, and they were SO worth the extra time and stress to do them!

I do have to share this, Austin turns 14 tomorrow, and I was hoping he would be changed and recharged through the week. And Saturday, I’m trying to upload photos on the computer, and Austin sits down next to me and tells me that God wants him to find new friends. His old ones were not a good influence on him at all and encouraged bad behavior. He wanted out of their “band” (I use that term VERY loosely LOL) and he had already called them all to cancel his birthday party scheduled for this Friday.

He also asked me if I would redo his Ipod and take ALL the songs off of it and start fresh with ONLY Christian, praise and worship music. And I did. Gladly.

And all day yesterday, he had his earphones in and a song in his heart. And by “in his heart” I mean, being sung at the top of his lungs. And he’s reading his Bible everyday and memorizing scriptures. He confessed some sins to me, and I let him know I would encourage him in anyway he needed me.

And today, we sat during naptime reading our Bibles and discussing it. I turned him on to the horrors of 1 Kings with the dogs and vultures eating the dead bodies in the fields and in the streets of the cities.

(It’s cool to a 14 year old boy LOL I do what I can)

So thank you for your prayers! They were needed!

Shameless plug: if you are in need of a Youth camp, Faithweek is it. It’s incredible! If you need a Youth speaker, Brad Fogarty out of Atlanta. Find him, look him up, book him, or just pray for him. His website is on the right over there —————->

If you are in the Tulsa, Oklahoma area and need a church home, Eastwood is it. Don’t come unless you want to experience God. Well, gosh, come even if you don’t, I don’t see how you can miss Him there.

This is longer than I anticipated….so I’ll leave you with the photo from before. I took this early Saturday morning with the sun streaming through the trees, dew still on the ground, and just a little fog hanging around to make it all look surreal.

I think it was God rewarding me for not killing anyone. 😉

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