Oh I’ve gone back and forth over this one. Fear of being found out I posted it to begin with…..just plain fear of scaring any of my blog readers….

But it just has to be said. Forgive me.

Dear Griswold’s creepy New Neighbors:

I love Christmas too! It’s the BEST holiday out there! The birth of our Savior…..yummy FOOD…..gifts to give……Charlie Brown Christmas trees……family…..

But, THIS:

THIS is not Christmas. I’m not even sure it’s Halloween.

THIS:

This may be Dateline material here. You know that Dateline where they find the dead bodies dressed and posed around the house like mannequins? But they’re dead?

And dressed?

And posed around the house like they are still alive? And in a REAL wedding dress?

THIS:

Yeah, it’s kind of like that….

And to add BABY DOLLS to the mix, like they are playing outside, in the cold, on a mat of Christmas lights…

Dude, I’m afraid of you. Like, seriously…..afraid of you. If my kids end up missing, I’m hunting YOU down. Not even joking there. I’m crashing YOUR pad first.

It’s CHRISTMAS! The celebration of my Savior’s birth! It’s festive! And fun! And beautiful!

It’s not the odd gathering of trinkets from your kitchen….

It’s just NOT! And I like to decorate with the best of them (I don’t, but I’d like to), but this……

….is even creepy at night! My kids can’t sleep! My husband has nightmares of the creepies coming to get him in ugly prom dresses and wedding attire….

I think you’ve kind of lost your minds. Honestly. It’s a bit MUCH. And I use MUCH kindly because what I’d like to say would be mean.

We are scared of you. Please. To keep my dog from whining in fright and my kids being too afraid to walk home from school, just DON’T.

No, really. D.O.N.’T.

Signed:

The Jones’ down the street.

No really, my name is JONES. Like BONES, but with skin. I’m not lying to you. We are the JONES and I promise, we WON’T try to keep up with you. I promise.

ETA: When I planned this whole post, and typed it all out to post today, I had no idea they would go even FARTHER. No, I’m not playing. It’s gotten creepier. They’ve added a THIRD big, freakish, prom-dress-wearing “angel” AND a doll the size of my 3 year old but with an adult mannequins head so it just looks like a strange little dwarf out there with a tutu on and pigtails. Wait….where’s Brooklyn? BROOKLYN!!!!

OK, no, she’s safe…..she’s cowering in the corner in the fetal position. But she’s OK. WHEW! Thought I was gonna have to do some damage control there…..We’re fine.

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